Love is something that people really should treasure, that people should really respect. I don't think some people think love is something worth while. I know that from past experiences that love is so very different from lust. Lust is just a short-term relationship at the most. But when lust never turns into love and you're still with each other after a number of years. What exactly is that? How can you have kids and still say you love each other, when it's pretty obvious that you don't. If you are always arguing and complaining about each other, it just proves that you lust each other, or maybe are better off as friends.

I can't get my head around the fact that when people are in a relationship that they take advantage of the other person or depend on them way too much. You had a great thing going, what went wrong? Why do you say you've already eaten, when you haven't, even though he made a nice candle-lit dinner for you? It's not fair. This is not real love.

Real love is out there though. Look at Charles and Alli from YouTube, you can see from their faces and the way they look at each other, that they really, really do love and care for each other. This is the love I want. I want to be so in love that I would be willing to jump sky-dive for my partner. I know this takes time and effort, but I'm willing and ready.

I can't love someone just for the sake of it. On Facebook, my friend Matt* didn't have a relationship status. His friend David* began chatting with me. After a while David said he was kinda seeing Matt.  But Matt had been flirting with me a lot. So I asked Matt what was the deal with him and David, he said they were kinda seeing each other a couple of months ago. But nothing really came of it. Matt added his relationship status: "Single". (Waffle, waffle, waffle) Anyway, David said he was single for like a week. And it just seemed like he moved onto "the next one", and that he's got a list of people he wants a relationship with. That kind of disturbs me. My point is, I can't say I love someone when I really don't.

Happy Friday.

My dream last night was rather weird. This is what happened, as far as I can remember:

I am in a sports store. I look down. I see a man's hairy body and the fact that I'm naked. (Ok, so I'm dreaming I'm someone else) I am not one bit embarrassed. I grab some liquid soap and start rubbing it all over my body, while still holding my "man-parts". I can hear music being played in the store, but I can't make it out what it is. Then it hits me, I have to save Erica's psychiatrist, Dr. Tom Wexlar (from Being Erica).

Next, I'm in a car going down a twisting steep road. (I'm assuming I'm wearing clothes.) There are road works. I'm going really fast and swerving to avoid cones, barriers and other road work "dangers".

After that, I'm in a shopping centre. I get to where Dr. Tom Wexlar is (I never actually see him). Suddenly, the Charmed sisters show up, and are about to blast him into smithereens. I say that I've known him for years in the future and try to convince them not to blow him up. They agree, but they'll "be keeping an eye on him".

Later, I go back to the sports store (which I now find out is a gym). I see a gym instructor, he's closing up. "I have to get my things and my lock", I say to him. He re-opens the door. Some people walk in behind me. I begin to help them out (Do I work there?) The gym instructor gets slightly more annoyed and begins to close the door again.

Then I woke up.

So, what's on my mind? Yesterday I saw Being Erica (hence why my dream was in the past), and tonight I'm going to watch Doctor Who - "The Waters Of Mars" (I must be able to time-travel in my dream), which first-aired on Saturday and I missed it. And me being the hot guy? Um... I was looking for someone to talk to/"invite for a coffee" on Skout on Facebook.

I have been thinking a lot about this recently. People seem to really care only about themselves. When you get down to the bare human emotions, you'll find that people will try to keep themselves alive (duh!) and be financially comfortable doing so.

I saw a video on YouTube by Jeff Takeover recently called "Make Christmas Come Early To A Dying Boy...". Basically, it's unlikely that he'll make it to Christmas and that Jeff has asked for people to send him some Christmas cards. I don't have a problem with this at all, seriously. But what about every other kid who won't make it to Christmas for one reason or another? Do they not deserve a card too?

I think when the word "charity" is thrown around, people generally stick their noses up at it, saying "it's my money, why should I give out free money to people I don't know?" People are more willing to keep their money for themselves and pay bills, and luxuries with it than give to charity. When I see those charity adverts on the TV, I ignore them. I think we have these luxuries becasue we want to feel secure, happy, loved.  For example, you COULD live without a microwave, a toaster and an iron. You COULD LIVE without that satellite TV and your HD plasma TV. You could give that money you were supposed to buy these things with to charity, but you didn't... So, are you a little bit selfish?

Sharing your money with those less fortunate is good, but not everyone wants to, or has to.

I'm not sure why I feel like this, but I feel really happy over the last couple of days. Maybe it's the home-made juices (tut tut tut) and smoothies I've been drinking maybe have perked up my spirits. Or maybe it's the possible future that I can see. I won't have severe money worries or won't need to think about the God-damn recession. I'm not saying what I feel is a bad thing, I feel so wondrously happy. And I'm loving every single moment of it.

(Originally posted on July 1st, 2009 at 12:22pm)

I was watching Big Brother last night. Halfwit (Freddie) was talking with Siavash on his bi-sexuality. He was saying that he had about 10 girls and about 30 guys. And that it was easier to “get a guy” than “get a girl”.  Siavash (who is straight) went over to Charlie (who is gay),and asked him if he would, basically fuck him, if the question was presented to him. Charlie answered: ” I wouldn’t say no."

Are all gay men like this? Do they get want they want just because they can? I’ve have actually realised that men are much more easier to get along with and are more willing to get laid quicker than a woman.Are most men just sex-crazed beasts?

I don’t think I could, nor do I want to, become one of them. I may have gay feelings and what not, but that doesn’t mean I’m a sex-crazed beast willing to get it up the bung-hole just because I can. (Fruit is better. LOL) I’m just not like that.

However, I can understand gay/bi-men who get it regularly. Sometimes sexual desires can take over. I think we all know that sex is something we all need. Otherwise, we’d all be sexually frustrated, then we’d end up bombing somewhere like South Korea… My sexual desires have been playing up lately. Too bad I’ll only have sex who someone I care for and understand (as in partner). Tempted to contradict myself.

I'm coming back to this blog because I feel that I still disagree with sex-crazed men. Sex is something I less desire than most people, maybe because I feel that sex must have a "natural" purpose. And it has, for a man and a woman, to create life. Even though I feel that men are, not only easier to get on with, but I can feel more of a sexual connection with a man, than I do a woman. I know people will disagree with this whole article.

On a slightly different note, sex is similar to chocolate in the way when we have some, we want more. But if we don't give into a craving, the craving will eventually disappear. Oh, your body may want it a few months later. But it passes after a while. Am I completely not desiring sex? Yes. I don't even feel the need to even bother looking for someone now.

Hopefully your penis will fall off if you insert it too many times... Then, you might be able to understand this blog a bit better.

(Note: this story is fictitious)